May 31, 2009

The Power of the Tongue

There is an old proverb with a lot of wisdom. It says, "The tongue has the power of life and death, and whoever loves it will eat its fruit."

It is so true. What we say has the ability to create situations, emotions, and thoughts in others. A kind word helps people, negative words hurt - sometimes for a very long time.

Most of the time we think of this concept in relation to how we treat others and that is good. In fact, I wrote an article in the last month or so called "The Power of Praising People." If you missed it, you can get it at the website.

But here I want to talk about this concept in relation to ourselves. How does what we say affect us? Tremendously. There is a simple principle here. Only say things that will create in you positive emotions, thoughts, feelings, and ultimately, actions.

Let me give you a good example. We do not allow the words "I can't" in our house. Why? Because we CAN! The very minimum is "I'll try." We ask our kids to say "I'll try." If we allow our kids, or ourselves, to fall into the trap of saying "I can't," guess what? We won't! And that's not good, is it?

Do you tell yourself negative thoughts during the day? Most of us can fall into that temptation, can't we? I was working the other day and I was brewing over something bad that had happened and I was just getting bent out of shape. So I stopped, realized I had the power to choose what I was saying to myself and began to think about and tell myself good things. And my day changed for the better.

Have you ever been in your backswing on the golf course and said to yourself, "I am going to shank this one." What happens? You shank it. This actually happens to me. So what do I do? I stop my backswing, reset myself, and tell myself I am going to hit it straight down the fairway. What happens? About half the time I hit it straight, the other half, I shank it, but increasing your ability is a future article! At the very least I increase my chances of performing better. Bad thoughts almost guarantee my failure, while good thoughts increase my chances for success dramatically.

A salesman may see someone walk through his door and say to himself, "I'm not going to be able to make this sale." I can't. I won't.

Some of us aren't even aware that we talk negatively to ourselves. Take some time today to think about what you say to yourself. Maybe ask a close friend if you have this habit. If you find yourself doing this, it is time to change!

Now, don't get me wrong. Self-talk is not a substitute for effort and ability, but it is a strong helping factor. Find some simple phrases that will help you get through the day with more success. Whatever your situation or work is, I am sure there are specific things you can say that will build you up and stick you on the road to success!

The words that you use and the conversations you have with yourself create things in you. They can create positive things or negative things. It is our choice. The tongue has the power of life and death. This is why it is so important to be diligent in using the power of the tongue to create a positive force in our lives.

Remember, your tongue has power. Use it!

About The Author:

Chris Widener is a popular speaker and writer as well as the President of Made for Success, a company helping individuals and organizations tu their potential into performance, succeed in every area of their lives and achieve their dreams.

To see Chris "live" at the upcoming Jim Rohn Weekend Event as he speaks on the subject of Secrets of Influence go to http://Chris-Widener.InspiresYOU.com/ or call 800-929-0434.

The Power of Courtesy and Kindness

I'm currently listening to The Secrets of the Power of Intention audio program by Dr. Wayne Dyer. I highly recommend the program. In the program, he speaks a lot about the importance of kindness. When you consistently have thoughts of kindness, you have a clear connection to the way things work well in the world. Good things start to happen to you automatically. Even the chemistry of your body changes to create emotions that make you feel good (endorphins). You begin to attract allies who will go out of their way to help you without being asked.

Here's a question: what if more and more people were "guilty" of random acts of kindness? Just simply being courteous and kind for no good reason--not to get anything out of the situation (or person). Just being kind for kindness' sake? How would the world change?

Here is an affirmation that will help condition your mind to stay in a state of kindness: "I am now courteous and kind to everyone I meet."

What if just seeing another person, any person automatically triggered this thought? How would your actions change toward them? How much broader would you smile? How would it guide your conversation? Would it focus on you or on them? How would this change your driving habits? This is a GREAT affirmation and if you use it often enough, you will create thought habits of courtesy and kindness.

As that happens, over time, many wonderful things will happen to you and those around you. And if enough people start to think this way, the whole world will change. Did I happen to say that I am an optimist? Here is an interesting point. I read some place about a study that was done about what men and women look for most in a prospective marriage partner. The number one quality that men looked for was looks. The number one quality women looked for was security. No real news there (maybe that's why we have so many divorces and unhappy marriages).

But the number two quality desired by BOTH men and women was KINDNESS. I would say that deep down, this is probably the number one quality we all want. Looks always fade with age. "Security" based on material things is often elusive (regardless of income). KINDNESS IS ETERNAL. It is a state of mind--a positive state of mind. So, if you want to meet other people's deepest need (as well as your own), condition your mind to think only thoughts of courtesy and kindness to yourself and to other people.

Copyright (c) 2005 Bill Marshall - All rights reserved. Feel free to republish this article provided you include the copyright information and the weblinks where possible.

For practical self-improvement tips, visit http://www.poweraffirmations.com. Get my new free e-book, "Power Affirmations: Power Positive Conditioning for Your Subconscious Mind"