On the road

On the road Direct Answers - Column for the week of January 27, 2003I got married with a man for a while 'time. I am married, but it was an arranged marriage, and I am very unhappy. I stayed with my husband, because the culture and my little children.Because I was not happy, I was happy to fall in love with a man I met. I never asked him for everything. I wanted to be able to have him as a friend. I know that will never be his wife, and I do not want him, but last week I discovered they are pregnant by him.I know the best way of dismissal, but it is tearing, besides me, I'm Catholic and my third child died at birth last year. When I told him, he totally freaked out big time. He told me to have an abortion as soon as possible. He said that for him was the entrance, and he would pay half, as if I have a common prostitute.He is only the second man I ever slept with. The first was my husband. I am beside myself and can not sleep or eat. When I try to contact him, said to be with his wife and family, and I do not disturb him.It appears only in sleeping with me, but I wanted someone to speak. I feel dirty. I can not even say it's my husband, as I do not sleep with him in over a year. Please help.ClioClio, how did this chain of events began? She married a man, not love. This was the first link in the chain. Love is something we all need. If you do not have love, we are looking for love. This research, that the second link in the chain.You and this man has no precautions to prevent pregnancy. This was the third ring. Now you have the choice whether to keep the child. This connection is likely to determine not only the future of the child, but the future of your marriage.Three suggest things that you want the child. They have recently lost a child, you have a chance of becoming pregnant again, and it is consistent with the religious tradition.As as unhappy in his marriage, the husband must be the same. If possible, you need to sit down with him and the state of marriage and the best strategy to follow now. Be open in your explanations.We can not tell you what decision to make, but the discussion with the husband is of utmost importance for your future and the future of your children. Currently you are desperate, but once you have the hardest, what - tell your husband - every day will be easier. You will then be on a path of truth, and your future can only be truth.Your measures not yet in comparison with the reality of the situation. Even one day in this direction will be the case even worse. If you think you can not argue with her husband, then you need to do with a trusted friend or one of many groups, but pregnancy counseling.At a time when people could have made a decision to protect himself and his wife. Those days are gone. He may be half-brother and half sister to your children and yours. His price is that the future is your decision, and the law makes it clear what his duties are.You have a life to live and children, to you. Based on honesty, your life, you can retu to the kind of life is scheduled yourself.Wayne & TamaraAbout The Author Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached by writing to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or e -- mail: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.